Growing With Peculiar

  “End the month with peace, not pieces — your reset button is waiting.” The end of the month always feels like a Nollywood cliffhanger,  bills waiting like stubborn landlords, goals half-ticked, and stress that didn’t even ask for rent but moved in freely.  But here’s the truth: every month gives us two gifts,  reflection and reset . Reflection reminds us of what went wrong ( yes, like those promises to stop overthinking that never saw daylight ). Reset gives us the chance to try again. So, before we enter a brand-new month tomorrow, pause and breathe: What habits weighed you down this month? What little wins can you celebrate (no matter how small, even surviving NEPA counts!)? And most importantly, how will you protect your peace in the month ahead? Remember: Stress will always audition for a role in your life, but you don’t have to give it the lead part.  Today’s blog is not for cho cho cho —it’s an overhauling of your mind, a reset to close the...

  Because even Mondays deserve habits that win, not just endless coffee refills. Ah, Monday. That one day that has the audacity to show up every single week. Honestly, who invited it? One minute you’re happily dancing away your Saturday night, the next minute Sunday whispers, “Tomorrow is Monday,” and suddenly your joy disappears faster than fuel at a Nigerian filling station. But here’s the truth: whether we like it or not, Monday is the perfect reset button. And the best way to beat Monday blues is by building winning habits, habits  that carry you through the week, habits that shape your life, and habits that turn you into that person people whisper about: “She’s got her life together!” So, how do we actually create habits that stick, without deceiving ourselves like those New Year’s resolutions we abandoned by January 3rd? Let’s break it down.   Start Small (Don’t Overdo Before You Undone Yourself) Listen, Rome wasn’t built in a day. In fact, even Nigeria wasn’t fix...

  “No need for extra mask, life already hard enough.” Happy Sunday fam! Today, let’s gist small about something that has become a full-time career for many people, PACKAGING. See, some of us have turned into professional actors and actresses. On Instagram you’re living in Banana Island, in real life you’re still in your uncle’s boys’ quarters. Online you’re a motivational speaker, offline you’re borrowing data to post “rise and grind.”  But the truth is this: authenticity is the new fine girl . Pretending is too stressful. When you’re always trying to wear a mask, you’ll end up forgetting which mask you wore yesterday. One day, your “fake accent” will jam your “real voice” and wahala will start. Why Being Real Pays Peace of Mind   Being yourself saves you from the headache of acting script 24/7. People Love the Real You   Nobody bonds with a mask. People connect better when you’re genuine, even with your flaws. Originals Are Priceless   There’s onl...

“Why worry when you can chop jollof and sleep this Saturday?”   Happy Saturday, my people!  See ehn, today is not for tension, today is not for headache, today is for relaxation . But some of you, instead of resting, you’re there calculating how your life will turn out in the next 25 years, plus the price of rice in 2050.  Overthinking is like carrying heavy load on your head while still dragging wheelbarrow with your hand. You’ll just collapse. And Nigerians? We are world-class overthinkers! “What if fuel price goes up again?” (as if you can stop it). “What if NEPA takes light in the middle of Champions League final?” (you’ll still shout “Up NEPA!” when they bring it back). “What if jollof rice finishes before it gets to my turn at the party?” (better position yourself near the cooler). See? That’s how wahala starts.  see as this Naija jollof rice set and you no gree chop, na overthinking you dy do. my guy just bring your spoon come make we chop, everything ...

  Depression on a Friday? Ko Le Werk!  I know it has been a bumpy ride with you and depression, and today we finish our series on depression. but don't ever let depression win you on a Friday, when you should be partying at least. My people, if depression had shame, at least it would respect Friday. Monday, we agree — it comes with its wahala: alarm ringing like police siren, traffic holding you ransom, boss breathing fire like dragon. Tuesday, we can still manage. Wednesday, the week begins to drag like generator without fuel. Thursday? At least hope is alive because Friday dey wave at us. But then, just when you’re trying to shout “TGIF!” , depression will stroll in uninvited like that uncle who never buys fuel but always plugs his phone in your socket.  Omo, no joy! How to Pepper Depression This Friday  Blast Music: Put on your favorite jam and dance as if you are auditioning for Nollywood background dancer. Depression hates vibes. Eat Good Food: Depressi...

  Depression is not laziness, it’s not weakness, it's a sign of recharging  “We need to take time to truly dwell on the subject of depression, because it eats deep into the fabric of life and has become a major public health concern in the area of mental health.” Hence the reason of still talking about depression still in today's blog They say, “Check on your strong friends.” And it’s true. Depression doesn’t always look like tears running down someone’s face or sitting in a dark room 24/7. Sometimes it looks like the loudest laughter in the room, the perfectly curated selfies, or the “I’m fine” responses we give so no one worries. Depression is not laziness, it’s not weakness, and it’s definitely not “you are being dramatic.” Let’s be honest, if life had a manual, the chapter on “handling stress, loss, and emotional storms” would be missing. That’s why so many of us end up winging it. And sometimes, the winging crashes. Now here’s the comic relief: Think of yourself like a ...

  Life knocked you down. Now let’s show it who the boss is  Life has a way of throwing curveballs, but your comeback can be stronger than the setback. We’ve all been there. One minute, you’re feeling on top of the world. The next, life smacks you in the face like a surprise pie at a birthday party. Okay, maybe not literally, but you get the point. Setbacks happen to everyone. The difference between staying down and bouncing back isn’t luck, its mindset, strategy, and sometimes a sprinkle of humor. Spot the Opportunity in the Ouch Every setback has a lesson. Maybe you failed, maybe you were rejected, maybe your favorite series got canceled (heartbreaking, we know). Instead of dwelling, ask: “What can I learn here?” You’d be surprised at the wisdom hiding behind those painful moments. Bounce-Back Strategies Feel It, Don’t Freeze It: Cry, scream, dance, whatever you need to process your emotions. Bottling it up only delays the comeback. Micro-Wins Are Magic: Start...

 IF I HAVE HIS BABY, HE WILL STAY WITH ME  If i have his baby, he will stay with me. All this and more are the lies young girls/women feed themselves with in order to justify their reasons to get pregnant for a man that is not their spouse. Let’s be real for a moment. In today’s world, love can be exciting, confusing, and sometimes… a little deceiving. Promises are sweet, words sound convincing, and emotions run high. But here’s a truth many women have learned the hard way: getting pregnant for him does not guarantee marriage. In fact, it might complicate things in ways you never imagined. The Illusion of Security So many young women fall into the trap of believing, “If I have his baby, he will stay with me.” But reality? A child doesn’t tie a man down, it only reveals where his true intentions lie. If he was not committed before, fatherhood won’t magically change his character. Love, commitment, and marriage are built on trust, responsibility, and shared vision, not on an...

  Falling is inevitable, but rising is a choice. Life has an interesting sense of humor. Sometimes it gives us victories so sweet we feel unstoppable. Then out of nowhere, it throws a punch that leaves us flat on the ground. It could be a heartbreak that feels like the end of the world, a job loss that makes you question your worth, or even something as simple as tripping in public while holding hot jollof rice (don’t ask me how I know ). The truth is: being knocked down is part of being human. But here’s the good news, being down doesn’t mean you’re out.   The Ground is Not a Grave When life knocks us down, our first instinct is often shame: “Why me?” But falling doesn’t mean you’re finished. The ground is not where your story ends, it’s where lessons begin. Some of the greatest comebacks in history were born from the lowest falls. Falling Teaches Humility Let’s be honest, nothing humbles you faster than being knocked off your feet. Life has a way of reminding us of tha...

  “What’s here? What’s working? What’s beautiful already?” Sundays have a way of slowing life down. The streets are calmer, the air feels lighter, and our hearts quietly whisper: breathe. It is in this gentle pause that we are reminded of something deeply powerful gratitude . We live in a world that often trains us to see what is missing: the job we don’t yet have, the house we wish we owned, the relationships we long for, the goals still unchecked. But gratitude flips the script. It doesn’t ask, “What’s missing?” Instead, it gently asks, “What’s here? What’s working? What’s beautiful already?” The truth is, gratitude is not about ignoring your struggles. It’s about recognizing that even in the middle of them, there are still blessings worth noticing. Think about it: The fact that you woke up this morning means life is still giving you another chance. The roof over your head—even if not the dream house—is still a shelter. The food on your table, however simple, is stil...

 Abuja Stories When people talk about holidays, you’ll often hear: “Oh, I went to Dubai, it changed my life!” or “Paris showed me love in a way I’ve never seen before!” Some even boast about Zanzibar sunsets or Kenyan safaris. But me? I decided to humble myself and test the waters closer to home—with a weekend in Abuja . Abuja, our capital city. The land of roundabouts that can confuse your sense of direction, politicians who somehow never get tired, and pepper soup that has the power to reset your entire destiny. I thought I was signing up for a quick, calm getaway. But instead, Abuja handed me an entire masterclass in mindset shifts —and it did it with laughter, spice, and quiet lessons hidden in everyday moments. Lesson 1: Simplicity is Bliss (Even in Wuse Market) My first stop was Wuse market. Ah, Wuse! If you haven’t been there, just imagine an entire motivational conference disguised as a shopping center. I went with a very clear goal: buy ONE bag. Simple. But the trader...

  Don’t just close your week, complete it Every Friday comes with a sense of relief. The week is over, the deadlines are behind us, and the weekend feels like a well-earned reward. For many people, Friday is about switching off. But what if I told you that the most powerful thing you could do on a Friday isn’t just planning your weekend, it’s pausing to reflect? Reflection is the missing piece in many people’s growth journey. We read books, listen to podcasts, attend trainings, and work tirelessly to “improve.” Yet, without reflection, all that information often slips away. Why? Because growth doesn’t come from experience alone . Growth comes when we take time to think about what those experiences taught us. Why Reflection Matters It transforms mistakes into lessons. It turns small wins into motivation for bigger victories. It gives clarity, helping us see where we’re headed instead of just moving aimlessly. Think about it: an athlete doesn’t just play game after game. T...

  The solution: A Digital Break. We live in a world where screens have become part of almost everything we do. From checking emails first thing in the morning, scrolling social media while eating, attending online meetings, to winding down with movies at night—our eyes and minds are constantly engaged with glowing devices. While technology is an incredible tool for connection and productivity, it comes with a hidden cost. The constant flood of information, notifications, and updates overstimulates the brain. Over time, this leads to mental fatigue, scattered focus, anxiety, and even disrupted sleep patterns. Many of us don’t even realize how much screens affect our ability to think clearly . The truth is: your brain needs space to recharge. When you take intentional breaks away from screens, you give your mind the rest it deserves. It’s like hitting the “reset” button. You’ll notice clearer thinking, sharper focus, deeper sleep, and an overall lighter mood. More importantly, you...

YOU MATTER TO ME RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW   When people talk about relationships, they often imagine big, romantic gestures—surprise trips, expensive gifts, or sweeping declarations of love. While those moments can be exciting, the truth is this: what keeps a relationship alive and strong are the little, consistent acts of care. Think about it. A plant doesn’t survive because of one heavy rain—it thrives because of the daily drops of water. Relationships work the same way.  Why the Small Things Matter It’s the everyday actions that build trust, intimacy, and safety. That quick “good morning” or “how was your day?” message. Sending a silly meme just to make them smile. Remembering their favorite snack and surprising them with it. Listening fully, without being glued to your phone. These seem small, but they build the emotional foundation that makes a young relationship last. The Relationship Mindshift Here’s the shift: Don’t wait for anniversaries or Valen...

OBSTACLES DONT COME TO BREAK YOU, THEY COME TO SHAPE YOU. If there’s one universal truth about life, it’s this: challenges are guaranteed . Whether it’s a delayed project, a financial strain, a health scare, or even just the daily stress of balancing responsibilities, obstacles show up uninvited. But here’s the secret,  obstacles don’t come to break you; they come to shape you.   The Hidden Gift of Challenges At first glance, obstacles feel like walls. They frustrate us, slow us down, and sometimes even make us want to quit. But if you take a step back, you’ll realize something powerful: Muscles only grow stronger when pushed against resistance. Diamonds are formed under extreme pressure. Trees root deeper when faced with storms. In the same way, life’s challenges are not random punishments, they are invitations to grow. They’re training grounds for resilience, wisdom, and strength. A Story to Remember I once worked with a young colleague who faced repeated job re...

   Mondays and the Magic of Intention Every new week comes with two options: drift through it reacting to whatever comes your way, or step into it with clear direction. The difference lies in one word— intention . Most of us wake up on Monday and rush into action: emails, deadlines, errands. But without a clear focus, the week becomes a blur. Setting a daily intention is like turning on a guiding light, it helps you stay aligned even when distractions pull at you.   What Exactly Is an Intention? An intention is not a rigid plan or a strict resolution. It’s a conscious choice of how you want to show up in your life. A goal says: “I want to achieve this.” An intention says: “I want to embody this.” For example: Goal: Finish my project by Friday. Intention: Stay calm and focused while working on my project. When you carry an intention, you carry energy that shapes not just what you do, but how you do it. Why Daily Intention Matters Clarity in Ch...

 STOP SCROLLING — You’re Not Late! Let’s be honest. At some point, we’ve all looked at someone else’s life and thought: “Wait, did I miss the memo?” Your old school friend is launching a startup, your cousin just bought a car that looks like it belongs in Fast & Furious, and someone on Instagram is living their “soft life” sipping coconut water on a beach in Bali… while you’re at home arguing with your generator that refuses to start. Sound familiar? Welcome to the comparison trap, where  someone else’s highlight reel makes your own story feel like a blooper reel. But here’s the thing: life is not Netflix, and you don’t have to compete for the spotlight. Why We Compare (And How It Drives Us Crazy) We humans are wired to compare; it’s like our default factory setting. From whom got the highest score in class to who’s the first to get married, we’ve been silently ranking ourselves since childhood. The problem? Comparison doesn’t motivate most of us, it just makes us feel l...